The Royal Treatment
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In a world nearly identical to ours, the North won the Civil War, Ben Affleck is the sexiest man alive, Martha Stewart is a better pastry chef than insider trader, and Russia never sold Alaska to the U.S. Instead, Alaska is a rough, beautiful country ruled by a famously eccentric royal family, ostracized by the other royals, and urgently in need of a bride for the Crown Prince. In fact, ANYONE would do. But they have no idea what they're in for when they offer the job to a feisty commoner...a girl who's going to need... The Royal Treatment The Princess-To-Be Primer, Or, Things I've Learned Really Quick, As Compiled by Her Future Royal Highness- Yeah, Whatever-Christina. That's me.
- Asking for cocktail sauce for your oysters will make the chef cry, then faint.
- Telling jokes you picked up from the guys on the fishing boat doesn't go over really well at a fancy ball.
- Telling the obnoxious younger royals you're going to kick them where the sun don't shine if they don't stop annoying you is guaranteed to make them follow you everywhere.
- Must learn to curtsy, stifle burps, and tell the difference between a salad fork and a fruit knife. Don't these people ever use hands?
- Must not keep thinking about Prince David's amazing eyes, lips, hands, shoulders, uh...wait, can I start over?
- Waltzing: Head up, fingers down, don't let the tattoo show.
- Remember: this is a business arrangement. That kiss in the gallery? The one that thawed the Alaskan frostiness down to a tropical heat? An aberration. Do not repeat...unless absolutely necessary.
- The most important word in royal family is still family.
- Becoming a princess is a lot harder than it looks.
- Falling in love is a whole lot easier...
Now, in this dazzling, delightfully wacky tale from MaryJanice Davidson, a tough commoner and a royal prince are about to discover that who they truly are...and what they desperately desire...may both be closer than they ever dreamed...